Doing things well is hard. You need persistence, passion, progression, and patience.

I’ve noticed that whenever I’ve become “good” at something, it’s because I possessed the four P’s. Likewise, I’ve noticed that whenever I’ve tried to get good at something and failed, it’s because I lacked one or more of the four P’s.

Okay, so I’m not the first person to discover the P’s (see the 3 P’s of Success or The 5 P’s of Success). But I did stumble on this idea indendendently, and concluded that 4 P’s suffice. There are other P’s I could have thrown in there (positivity, people, practice), but I didn’t think they were as important.

Persistence

You can’t give up. You need to regularly show up.

This is the most important of the four. It’s a bit of a cliche, but it’s true: if you never give up, then you can’t fail. Do not let up, and do not skip days. This sounds hard, but it’s actually not very hard at all if you possess the other 3 P’s. If you struggle with this, it’s likely just a symptom, with the root cause being one or more of the other P’s.

It’s important to establish a habit and routine. Without that, persistence easily falls apart at the seams. One skipped day becomes two, then a week, then two weeks, then your progression falters and suddenly there’s an uphill struggle to make up lost time, causing your passion to plummet, and now you’re dangerously close to failure.

On days when I don’t feel like practicing, I’ll often remind myself that I just need to show up. I need to attend. If I can have perfect attendance, then I know I will be more likely to succeed. There will be good days and bad days, but you need to be there for both. I’ve found that a bad day can turn into an unexpectadly good day after practicing, either because I feel better that I practiced, or because I made unexpectedly good progress during the practice session.

If you fall off the horse, the best thing you can do is get back on without thinking too much about it.

Passion

Passion is going to wax and wane over time. It’s usually the initial spark that starts you on the journey. However, it is guaranteed that there will be days where you’ll forget why you got started in the first place. You’ll question your life choices, you’ll drag your feet, you just won’t feel like doing it.

I think the typical metaphor of fire is good here. You need to make sure the fire doesn’t go out, but there will be times when it starts to die, and there will be other times where it feels like it burns so hot that it’s out of control.

The other 3 P’s can help fuel the fire. For instance, if you have good progression and patience, you will get better and open up doors to new unexplored realms. A simple example would be strength training - as you get stronger, your body looks better, you can lift more weight, and your passion reignites at the thought of new possibilities.

Passion is not something you can generate at will. It often shows up at unexpected times, but when it does, you can make amazing progress.

Progression

You have to push yourself, but not too much.

Progression is important, because this is how you will get better. Without progression, you will plateau and not improve, which will negatively impact your passion and patience.

It’s a delicate balance that will be different for everyone. I think it would be optimal to push yourself as hard as you can while maintaining good persistence (not skipping practice, workout days) and passion (fire not burning out).

Coming up with a detailed plan of progression can be challenging, but it’s important that you try. In the best case, you can follow the progression of someone else that has been successful. If you are charting unknown territory, you will have to come up with your own progression. The plan does not need to be perfect (nor can it ever be). In fact, the plan will need to change as you get better and adapt to new stimulus. Some plans will be more “efficient” than others, but as long as you have persistence, you can rest assured that you are getting better over time.

It’s much better to consistently follow a sub-optimal progression plan than to inconsistently follow an optimal plan.

Patience

“It’s a marathon, not a sprint.”

This one is nearly important as persistence. You need to be willing to accept that it will take a long time to get where you want. If it were easy, everyone would do it. It’s not easy, and you will not achieve success overnight. Most of the population will never achieve success.

The root cause of many failures is that there were unrealistic expectations from the outset. Social media makes it challenging to have patience. There are plenty of success stories found on YouTube, but almost no failure stories. It’s a distorted view of the world, where it seems like everyone is better than you. On the flip side, it can be motivating to see someone who has achieved great success. If they can do it, so can I. But it’s important to recognize that this “distortion field” exists.

You may find it’s best to ignore the progress of others, and do not compare yourself to them. Have patience with yourself, but periodically check in to make sure you’re making progress, and that you are better than you were 6 months ago.

Honorable Mention: Time

(Yeah, I know, it doesn’t start with P.)

Time is worth mentioning because it is a finite resource that we can run out of. Getting good at something takes a serious time commitment, and you only have room in your life for a certain number of things. You need to choose what’s important to you. You can’t be good at everything.

You may have heard of Malcolm Gladwell’s 10,000-Hour Rule, where he claims that the key to achieving world-class expertise in any skill is a matter of practicing correctly for 10,000 hours. This is interesting, but it’s not very helpful to anyone actually trying to gain that expertise. What does “practicing correctly” even mean? How do I know whether I’m practicing correctly? Usually the answer to this question has to come from within, though a good teacher can help guide the way.

What does failure look like?

I’ve found that lacking in even one of the four P’s can lead to failure. Lacking in two is almost certainly a recipe for failure.

Problem Result
No Persistence? Slow, inconsistent progress; Other P’s decline
No Passion? No enjoyment; Waste of time
No Progression? Plateauing; Spinning your wheels; Waste of time
No Patience? Burning out; Defeatist attitude

As an anecdote, I’ve had several false starts trying to learn piano as an adult. I would play for 6 months to a year and make great progress, and then I’d stop playing and give up. I never understood why. Did I lack discpline and determination? Am I just not cut out for piano?

I now know why I failed those times (and why I am currently “successful” in piano for the last 2.5 years). During those false starts, I had plenty of passion and progression, but I lacked in persistence and patience. I did not show up consistently to practice. I would have epic 3 or 4 hour practice sessions on the weekend, but I was very inconsistent during the week, often not practicing at all. This, coupled with an unrealistic expectation to be playing pieces much higher than my skill level led to burnout and failure.

I believe that if I had only had more persistence (i.e. practiced more regularly) then the lack of patience is something I could have overcome eventually.

Final Remarks

The four P’s are more than the sum of their parts. As you add them together, there is a feedback loop that can amplify the others. You’ll find that it’s easier to be persistent when you have good passion and patience. Your passion will benefit as you reap the rewards of progression.

The four P’s are not something you consciously think about (at least not very often). However, if you find yourself struggling in your journey, then it can be useful to take a step back and assess where you might be lacking in the four P’s.

Although I framed the four P’s in the context of getting good at something, I think it can apply equally well to other areas, such as marriage, career, cutting back on alcohol, and any number of other “hard” things.

I’m by no means an expert, nor am I really world-class at anything, but I have found the four P’s to be a recurring pattern in my life that has helped guide me towards success.